Horoscopes for February

Pisces(Feb.19-March 20)- If you see a "Goat 4 Sale" sign, don't take the Goat...

Aries(March 21-April19)- If you hear "Bootielicious", step back because Destiny's Child is going to rise out of the floor.

Taurus(April 20-May20)- Ring around the rosie, your pockets are full of snakes. Ashes, Ashes, Don't fall down.

Gemini(May 21-June 21)-Don't turn on the tv, this week the news will show something destructive and you will want to get it.

Cancer(June 22-July 22)-Love is in the air, too bad you're single.

Leo(July 23-Aug.22)- Don't turn around, slenderman is right behind you.

Virgo(Aug.23-Sept.22)-You've just won $10,000,000 for the next two seconds... and now its gone!

Libra(Sept. 23-Oct.22)-You're going to bite your cheek while chewing gum, then immediately bite it again

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov.21)-Here's a Cosco Membership card. There's a 50lb drum of raisins with YOUR name on it.

Sagittarius(Nov.22-Dec.21)-If you go to the mall, watch out for the hair salon women, they want to fix your hair!!

Capricorn(Dec.22-Jan.19)- You've just won this game show... Do you even remember the name of it?

Aquarius (Jan. 20- Feb. 18)- You have a chance to get on the Steve Harvey Show, do you have time for One Last Thing?

By Cory Donley and Sarah Akers